IronYman

This is my Timex, "Ironman" watch. It's a couple of years old. It's water resistant to 100 meters. I have never gone below 100 meters during any of the athletic events with which I've worn it.

After Wildflower, there were some beads of perspiration on the inside of the window and the digital numbers were jaded. I waited a few days, then the days turned into weeks. This is my watch, almost two months later. Ironman? Takes a licken' and keeps on ticken'? Well, yes, it is still ticking. I think. It would appear that the seconds are still rolling and the date changes over every 24 hours. Bravo, Timex. You have really done a bang-up job on your performance watches.

I have some suggestions for new names:

ContraryMan: Contrary to popular belief, I don't care what time it is.

If-I-Only-Had-A-Heartrate-Man: Maybe I'm in my target. Maybe not. Only the Gods know for sure. And I'm ok with that. I guess.

EuphamismMan: As in, I'm going to do an ironman, and by ironman, I mean I'm really going to sit on my couch and watch tv. Is it time for Friends yet? Shit, I can't tell.

HopefulMan: As in, I hope the beads go away and I hope I can complete this endurance event. Gosh, it sure would be nice.

IronyMan: Ah, I am accustomed to the bitter taste of doubt, sarcasm and contradiction. And that's exactly what I look for in a triathlon watch.